• Faith,  Family,  Holy Spirit,  Stress

    Changing Seasons, and Changing With Them

    During my experience as a pregnant woman, and now as a mother, I’ve learned some things about myself, about women, and even more important, about God. At the beginning, I asked a lot of questions. A LOT of questions. So often, the answers I received were not what I expected. I expected black and white; I expected definitive answers. All too often, I was met with, “You’ll find the answer.” Why, I thought, wasn’t there an answer that I could scribble down on a Post-it and stick on my fridge, so I couldn’t get it wrong? I think back to when I was a young Christian, and the same was…

  • Blog,  Faith,  Pain,  Prayer

    Beautifully Broken

        “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” -Lamentations 3:22-23 ESV   The end-of-the-year holiday seasons have always been a time of reflection for me. With Thanksgiving just around the corner, this year is no exception! My son, Maddox, is in North Carolina with his Dad and soon-to-be stepmom and step-brothers. As I sit by myself, in a paradox of simultaneous renewal and restlessness, I am struck by the irony of life. I am 39 years old, slightly more than four months away from the Big 4-0, and my life looks NOTHING…

  • Faith,  Family,  Hope,  Love,  Prayer

    “I’m Already Home”

    “Home,” a simple four-letter word. Yet, the definition can be quite extensive. The first definition of home on Dictonary.com is as follows: A noun; the place where one lives permanently; especially as a member of a family or household. I fully acknowledge that the word “home” may have a negative connotation for some while it creates a warm, fuzzy feeling for others. If you have struggled with an unfortunate home life, please stick with me for a minute! For me, the meaning of home has evolved over the years. I was born in Missouri. I had an awesome childhood on a 40-acre farm. My grandparents were all a 30-minute drive…

  • Career,  Faith,  Family

    I Believe in You

    Right after I got married, I couldn’t find a job. I went straight to grad school from undergrad, graduated with my master’s degree in English, and then spent the next couple of months finishing up wedding planning. I figured I’d search for a job after our honeymoon.  But six months passed with barely an interview, and I was getting pretty bored sitting at home all day watching “The Price is Right” and reruns of “Quantum Leap” while my husband was at work. I decided I needed to do something—anything—while I still hunted for a writing job that might actually make use of some of my six years of college learning.…

  • Faith,  Hope,  Motherhood,  Relationships

    Faithful Provider

    Are you praying for something so fervently in your life, but you feel like God isn’t listening? Are you in the middle of your season and losing faith that you’re ever getting out of it? Do you hope with every fiber of your being for God to change a situation, but, in actuality, doubt God’s power or that He will ACTUALLY show up and do anything? If I’m honest with myself, I’ve struggled with putting all my faith, or maybe even any faith, in God to handle things in my life. I’m logical, and I’m a realist. I deduct the best possible outcome and go from there. As a child…

  • Blog,  Faith,  Fear,  Hope,  Prayer

    The Revolving Door

    While there are things in life that will only be singular events, there are many more that seem to be on a revolving door. At least, I have found this to be true for me. Something quite recently that I have been reliving again is this whole “waiting for answers” scenario. As if just waiting on one answer weren’t enough, this time around, my husband and I are anxiously waiting to get answers on multiple BIG situations—a possible job opportunity, medical results for a child, more medical results on our other child, our housing situation—the list has really gotten pretty extensive. I always feel like once the “waiting period” for…

  • Faith,  Hope,  Pain

    Finding Freedom In The Ashes

    There I was, sitting at a bonfire surrounded by a few girlfriends—all sharing a portion of our story. This week’s topic was forgiveness—or maybe a better title was “unforgiveness”! I had already committed in my head that tonight would be the night! I had come to the realization that I wasn’t hurting anyone but myself by holding on and not forgiving. I was drinking the poison but expecting all those who hurt me to feel the effects.   And finally, it hit me; what was I missing out on in the story God had written for me by being stuck and unable to move forward? I was missing the anticipation…

  • Blog,  Faith,  Family,  Fear,  Hope,  Motherhood,  Pain,  Parenting,  Prayer,  Stress

    The Mother of All Fear

    Fear. It’s a real icky four-letter word. We’ve all experienced it. We’ve all cowered under it. And we have all surely tried our best to overcome it. Dictionary.com defines fear as “a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined.” I’d say that’s pretty accurate to what I’ve felt. And I can honestly say I’ve experienced a new depth of fear since becoming a mom. I wish I could say that I get these warm fuzzy feelings when I think about the birth of my little girl. Instead, I look back at it and feel the fear. When Charis came out, she…

  • Faith,  Fear,  Hope

    WAIT…What?!?

    Do you ever have those moments in life where you feel like you are headed in a specific direction, but you are still walking around feeling unsure of each step? Do you ever feel like you take a couple of steps forward with confidence and trust, just to find yourself sliding back into the chains of doubt and discouragement? For me, I’m finding that faith is kind of like stepping into the future blindfolded! On the one hand, you know that you are in good hands and that God IS good! You have seen His provision firsthand and felt His protection in times of trouble. You can look back on…

  • Faith,  Holy Spirit,  Relationships

    He is Everywhere

    Have you ever been somewhere, and you thought, “Oh, my God; God is really here”? You know, one of those moments or incidents where you can feel His presence, or something is shown to you that you can’t explain how or why. Some of us shrug it off and call them coincidences, while others grasp onto them, holding them for dear life, knowing it was God. I truly believe “coincidence calling” is either from fear or a lack of belief or doubt that God would be interested in our lives. I’ve noticed from my own “coincidence calling,” fear was the culprit. Fear of what others thought, fear that I was…